The_Soulless

smarky-smark:

the-soulless:

smarky-smark:

Started out like any other, I woke up at a time that others usually find ridiculous (12pm), had a shower, ate breakfast, and hopped onto the internet until my mother told me that I had to clean the laundry and the bathroom. So I did this with my ANGRYFACE on (because the mop I had to use to clean…

This story was not true.

I was instead taken hostage buy some Pakistanis who owned the store I attempted to mug on the Friday afternoon because I was bored. They put a bag over my head and drove many miles to a desert where they held me prisoner and forced me to sing Happy Birthday to their cousin. It was a great party and I got free birthday cake.
I then sneaked out of the celebration and walked out to the middle of a road running through the middle of the desert. A trucke happened to coincidentally drive by at that time so I hitchhiked and caught a ride with him.
We had a wonderful conversation that went something like this:
Me- “So do you do anything else for a living besides drive trucks?”
Truckie- “Yeah I’m also a cereal killer”
Me- “Oh, well not to sound rude but I think I’d like to get out now”
Truckie- “No that’s ok, its understandable. I get that a bit actually. Would here be fine?”
Me- “Yeah here would be great”
And then I climbed out of the vehicle and continued walking in the Godforsaken heat before entering a lust rainforest and getting myself lost. I then came across two forest girls who let me stay the night and made me breakfast. Unfortunately that was all that happened, but they did manage to point me in the right direction.
I was then abducted by aliens soon after. They didn’t speak my language so we ended up playing a fun game of charades, which I totally won. However they didn’t really appeal to the idea of loosing so they kicked me out of their spacecraft and I somehow landed on my knee and lived, only to wake up in hospital a few hours later with no recollection of how I got there.
Regardless of this I figured that I should probably be getting home so I walked out the front entrance (security was pretty lack I would have to admit) and then hot wired a police car which I ended up rolling into a river only a few kilometres away from my house.
After having jumped out of the car in the last second I carried on my journey home where I jumped in through my window that I had happened to leave open and fell asleep for an hour before getting up to go to work.

And that was my weekend.
I told you this already remember Jamie? =P

That was your friday you moron :P

Don’t know why you ran away from that truckie, he was only a “cereal” killer after all, he wouldn’t have tried to kill YOU. :P

I am cereal… give me your all your milk ;) … <>